As luck would have it, my co-organiser conned another pub into receiving our gang of grannies and all seemed well. We were (supposedly) tucked away in a corner of the pub on a raised platform. It meant we had to squeeze past dart-players, but they were very amenable to moving and gave up playing with pretty good grace in the end. Nothing like making your presence felt!
The lunch was great, but I don't think we will be invited to return. My co-worker, not known for her diplomacy, had already annoyed the bar staff by the time I arrived, to say nothing of some of the early arrivals.
It took some time ferrying people into taxis and unloading them at the other end. I had carefully written out a table plan, but everybody sat where they liked; indeed some of them flatly refused to move once they had sat down. Shepherding recalcitrant sheep is definitely not my forte.
I have put on a bit of weight lately and wore a dress I haven't worn for some time - it was a bit tight, but not too short, so I thought it would be fine. My partner assured me that 'my bum did not look big in it' (I would have killed him had he said it did), but one very frank old lady told me it did - she's 92, so I suppose she would know!
There were other volunteers helping serve the drinks and they had been provided with all kinds of headgear - antlers and Santa hats to name just 2. One of the male volunteers really got into his part as Father Christmas ho-ho-ho-ing all over the place; his act slightly spoilt by his trousers slipping down. (Good thing it wasn't children he was giving presents too).
The saddest part, for me, was the old lady who said she didn't want to go home as she would just be up in her flat on her own! I am sure there are several elderly people either with no relatives or none living close to them who will spend Christmas alone.
Of course, there are those 'elderly' parents/grandparents etc. who are invited annually to their children/grandchildren and don't have any desire to go. They find the grandchildren noisy and the layout of the bathroom difficult etc. etc. If only people were honest and told one another what they really want to do - it is quite possible that the children/grandchildren dread having the parents every bit as much as they dread going there.
I have the best of both worlds this year - I will be spending Christmas Day with my lovely man at home, where we shall lay about a lot, eating, watching films and generally being very slatternly. He is the cook in our house so 'Heaven' I shall sit about while he stands over a hot stove. We are not eating turkey! We are having Beef Wellington on Christmas Day, lobster (from Iceland - the shop, I mean, not the country) on Boxing Day when a friend is coming over and there will be more eating, drinking and socialising.
Then I am spending time with my family - sisters, brother, niece and their families altogether in a place not far from Manchester. The worst of Christmas will be over by then - the turkey and the clearing up (my sister is fanatical about tidying up, often on Boxing Day - hoovering around the rest of the family). I expect we will be on sausage and mash as an antidote to all that rich food. My partner, who still thinks 'up north' consists of clogs, hats and greyhound racing, is not coming with me, so there will be none of that concern as to whether he is enjoying himself listening to my relatives who are a noisy lot at the best of times. Actually, there will be a greyhound in the equation - a pet of one of the family. My man - he who must not be obeyed - will be looking after our completely crazy cat.
